Raise your standards!
#Dating #Love #Loveforalifetime #Relationships
What do I mean by raise your standards? I mean that you need to start expecting more from the man or woman you are dating. As a society, we have "dumbed down" our expectations for a great relationship. We have been taught that we can't have everything we want in a relationship. We are told we need to compromise.
One of the most common statements I hear from new clients is "Well, maybe I'm too picky." More often than not, this stems from the fact that they have not been successful in their search for the right relationship. People generally will accept a mate that has some or even most of the qualities they are looking for, but end up being disappointed because there is something missing. They are not in a relationship that is fulfilling. They just haven't been picky enough. Their standards for a relationship are too low. Consequently they are continually disappointed. Does this sound familiar to you?
It saddens and frustrates me when I hear marriage and relationship experts say that you have to become selfless and give up your dreams and goals for the greater good of a marriage. I will agree with that only to the extent that you recognize that you chose poorly when you decided to marry and now you have to struggle to maintain a less-than-extraordinary marriage. If you had chosen better in the first place, if you hadn't settled, if you had listened to your gut instinct, you wouldn't be where you are today. You wouldn't be in a mediocre marriage or, in many cases, divorced.
Raise your standards for yourself and the one you are searching for. Make sure you are a person you would love to date. If you aren't, get to work on the things you need to improve. In the meantime, wait for the right relationship even though it is time consuming and sometimes lonely. It's okay to keep searching until you have found your perfect mate. I can hear many of you saying "Rick, no one is perfect!" Notice I didn't "the" perfect mate! I said "your" perfect mate. It is my total belief that we all have someone out there that is perfect for us. They possess all of our "Must Haves" and we posses all of theirs. There are no compromises on core values.
When you ultimately find your perfect partner, you will more than likely find that they have everything you were looking for and more. This person you find will far exceed your expectations. Raise your standards instead of compromising and settling! You will end up being much happier in the long run.
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About the author.
Rick Soetebier is an Author, Blogger, Speaker and Dating Coach. He has been a student of self and relationship improvement for more than 28 years. He is an astute observer of people and relationship issues. Over time and through a relationship and marriage that ended after 25 years, Rick started to develop some of the fundamental principles that are found in his book, Dating Backward: A practical guide to dating and finding your soul mate. You can benefit from his observations, education, research and personal experience by letting him help you make better relationship decisions. Date consciously and settle for nothing less than extraordinary in your next relationship.
