Love for a Lifetime, LLC

Poor communication = opportunities lost! #Dating #Relationships #DatingConsciously #Lifetimeoflove

This point was driven home recently when I was texting with a woman I had dated for a short time. I'm not a big fan of texting and believe that it is part of the reason this potential relationship failed. However, a bigger part of the failure of the budding relationship was a lack of communication and understanding between each of us.

I finally asked her "Why are you afraid of a relationship with me?" She replied "You were going pretty fast. I just wanted to slow down." Wow! Was that a surprise out of left field! Never once had she commented that things were moving too quickly or that she wanted to slow our relationship down. In fact, she gave every indication that she was in the same frame of mind, emotionally and relationally, that I was. That could have been great information to know before the relationship collapsed!

Unfortunately this information was revealed to late for me to want to try to resurrect any type of relationship. There comes a point in when too much has happened and it is nearly impossible to recreate the original interest in someone because you don't know what is not being said. You start to walk on egg shells, wondering what else you might be doing wrong. That is no way to try to start a relationship, yet so many people I have met will do just that. They will try to build something from the ashes of what could have been.

Personally, I'm not a fan of working and working and working to make a relationship come together because you see some potential. Either it works, or it doesn't. Don't misunderstand; all relationships take work! But there has to be some natural connection and a natural "flow" to the relationship. It can't be all work (especially by only one person) with only short periods of coasting and enjoyment. Life is too short to have to work that hard day in and day out to build and grow a relationship.

The key to a great relationship is to find that special person with whom you connect intellectually, spiritually, emotionally and physically. From here you can develop great communication. If the great communication doesn't develop relatively quickly, it won't make any difference how much you have in common, the relationship may start out with a lot of sizzle, but will eventually fizzle. By learning to recognize early the difference between great and poor communication, you will save a lot of time that would normally be wasted in poor relationships. Again, life is too short for that. Stay focused.

If you or someone you know has questions about dating, please send them to me at rick@luv4alifetime.com.

If you enjoyed this article, please Like and Share on Facebook with your friends.  You can subscribe to my weekly blog at http://luv4alifetimellc.blogspot.com/

For information on workshops, events and coaching go to luv4alifetime.com/seminars.html.

About the author.

Over the past 30 years, Rick Soetebier has been a student of self and relationship improvement. He is an astute observer of people and relationship issues. Over time and through a relationship and marriage that ended after 25 years, Rick started to develop some of the fundamental principles that are found in his book, Dating Backward: A practical guide to dating and finding your soul mate.  You can benefit from his observations, education, research and personal experience by letting him help you make better relationship decisions. Date consciously and settle for nothing less than extraordinary in your next relationship.