Are you in control of your emotions?

Let's think about these two questions. Are you in control of your emotions? Or, do you let others control your emotions?

I cannot tell you the number of times that I have heard "I don't want to hurt his/her feelings." Or "He/she hurt my feelings." If you seriously think about these last two statements, the only way for you to hurt someone's feelings is if they give you permission. The only way you can have your feelings hurt is if you give someone else permission to do so. This is a very difficult concept for most of us to learn. In general, we don't want to be responsible for what we feel. It is always easier to say it is someone else's fault if our feelings are hurt. On the other hand, we somehow feel we have unlimited control of other people's feelings. In reality...we don't. We have no more control over someone else's feelings than they have over ours.

The key to remember is that you, and you alone, are in control of your feelings. When you take responsibility for what you feel, you will be amazed at how good you can feel most of the time. I'm not saying that you won't feel hurt from time to time. We all do. But, the feeling will not last long when you understand that YOU are in control...not any outside influences.

Time is precious, and to spend time in a bad relationship is time lost forever. Settling for a relationship that is less than extraordinary is to short change yourself and your mate.

A Gentleman should...

 

I have been asked to write about the art of being a gentleman. In doing my research, I have found several good blogs and books on the topic. So, I will keep this relatively short by just listing some of the key characteristics of a gentleman.

 

A gentleman should always:

• Open doors for a lady
• Walk her to her car or front door
• Walk on the curb side of the street
• Seat the lady first before sitting down
• Dress appropriately for the occasion
• Use good manners
• Be hygienic
• Be honest
• Be a gracious winner
• Be a gracious loser
• Make others feel like they are the center of attention
• Watch your mouth
• Remove your hat indoors
• Wait for others to get their food before eating
• Help a lady with her coat
• Reach for the check

 

If you have questions on how or why, just Google "etiquette of a gentleman" and you will find plenty of resources.

Relationships...like the seasons of the year.

All relationships go through cycles just like the seasons of the year. In the beginning, the relationship is fresh and new (Spring). Then it starts to grow and flourish (Summer). Now, the relationship is mature. Some parts start to fade in color while other parts display their most brilliant colors (Fall). Finally, the relationship slips away either through a deliberate decision to end it or the unplanned loss of a spouse (Winter). For most people, the cycle will begin again. Unlike the seasons of the year, seasons of relationships are generally unpredictable. An entire relationship life cycle may last only a few weeks or it may last a lifetime. Ultimately, we all search for that one relationship that will last a lifetime.